Posted by: zenmamajo | February 4, 2011

I Suffer From “Throat Poo” and So May You…

throat poo,
throat poo,
ew! ew! ew!
throat poo,
throat poo,
i loathe you!

alright – i promise not to gross you out any more than necessary…but you’re reading because you either suffer from the same chronic affliction, are wondering if you are suffering from the same affliction, or are drawn to peculiar blog titles…regardless of why you stopped in – here’s my story…

i’ve been suffering from an on again off again sore throat for the last several weeks…this morning i woke feeling like something was lodged in my throat. i decided to bust out a flashlight and examined my throat.

i was alarmed to find two whitish…somethings on the right side of my throat!

i immediately consulted my trusted source for all things mysterious: dr. google. i asked him about “white spots on throat”…

was it strep throat? nope…i lacked all the classic symptoms of fever, fatigue, throat redness…

throat candida (aka: yeast infection in the throat – ew to the infinidith power!!!) – nope again.

was it throat cancer??? no…that’s just the hypochondriac in me…

then i saw something about tonsil stones (aka: “throat poo” as another blogger shared)…naw…too gross…that couldn’t be it…

a friend of mine, who happens to be a nurse, stopped by today after lunch. i casually mentioned the mysterious white spots and promised i wouldn’t breath on her in case i have strep or some other contagious illness.

she told me about how one of her daughters suffered from throat issues recently and learned after visting a doctor that she has tonsillolith aka: tonsil stones aka: THROAT POO!!!

ew! ew!

my friend went on to share how she removed them by practically gagging herself with a toothbrush and how her son and herself also develop them occasionally…

i told her i didn’t think that was it but asked if she could take a peek anyways (really to save me a trip to the doctor’s office!)…

she aimed that mini red maglite down my throat and seconds later declared “Yup – that’s them. Those are tonsil stones.”

nnnnOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

okay, okay – so what are these little nuisances?

well – in short – the back of our throats are very… cavernous…a warm, moist, dwelling for foods, post nasal drip, dead skin among other things that can become ‘trapped’ in resulting in calcified matter….

ew! ew! ew! (i can’t say this enough…)

after the diagnosis – i racked my brain and realized that i have unknowingly been suffering from this affliction for years! i’d never heard of “tonsil stones” until today! i recalled times when i coughed up little pieces of something over the years but thought it was leftover food (little did i know it was leftover food…way leftover…).

now i’m suffering from throat poo myopia – scouring the internet for answers to why? WHY?! and ways to treat and prevent…i’m paranoid that everyone i smile at or speak with will “know my secret” (hey…it’s one thing to blog about it to ‘virtual friends’ – another to speak face-to-face *hahah*)…i’m counting down the seconds until they dislodge…every time i drink or eat something i try to swallow quickly so that the food will by pass the ‘caverns’…

dr. google also informed me that there are many, many closet throat poo suffers and unknowing suffers – so i’m bringing this bothersome affliction in to the light (and hopefully out of those caves)!

if you’re a fellow sufferer – consult dr. google about this issue and you will find countless stories and self-treatment methods.

cave dwellers beware: we’re on to you!

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